Monday, 21 May 2012

It's Been A While

You may have noticed I haven't blogged for a while, or may be you haven't!
The thing is I've been in a bit of a, well I don't know how to describe it really.
When I started this blog the idea was to chronicle my last year in my forties; I wanted to blog every day so that I have a record of this last year. So I really should blog the rough as well as the smooth.

So this is the rough:
I have been feeling down for quite a while and have been to the doctor and been prescribed anti-depressants, not for the first time in my life.
My first experience with depression was in the early nineties, after I'd split up with my first husband. It was a horrible time for me but with the help of the tablets and moving to Turkey for my Shirley Valentine time, I recovered.
The next time was shortly after the birth of my second child. I'd had a very difficult pregnancy and my eldest child didn't take too kindly to the arrival of a rival so post natal depression soon set in. Once again I recovered only for it to reoccur a couple of years later.
Years passed and then in 2009 my eldest son was diagnosed with a rare condition. We went through a lot, including a while when we thought he was going to die, and I finally broke down towards the end of the year and went back on anti depressants.
I have had to give up my job at college and I now work for myself. I have gone from having three jobs to virtually nothing. I receive carer's allowance for my son and he gets disability living allowance. I sometimes feel bad that I don't have a 'proper' job but then there will be another medical appointment or he will be ill, or worse still, he will have an epileptic fit and then I think to myself, 'Who would employ me with all the time I need to take off?'
It is a terrible thing to live every day of your life worrying about your child, waking up in the night with your heart pounding because you think you can hear him telling you he's having a fit, and when he does have them it is just awful to see this child you carried inside of you for 8 months (he was early!), this child that you love so much going through such an awful thing. And then, afterwards, you can't get the images out of your head, you are constantly watching him, waiting for the next one, afraid to let him out of your sight.
This is not how life should be.
Ok I'm going to stop now, no photos, no funny one liners, just my life at the moment.
Thanks for reading.

Wednesday, 9 May 2012


Here it is again and here is mine today
No crafting as I'm off to meet a friend in a minute! I haven't seen her for absolutely ages so it should be fun.
So on my table we have left over glasses from last night, no we didn't have a party but my children don't seem to be able to only use one glass. A letter sent to my mum with a parking fine, it was me!!! I park in Lidl to get free parking but unfortunately I was 11 minutes over the time and got caught. The annoying thing was I had an appointment with the bank manager and he was 20 minutes late hence the fine! I'm going to write to him to see if he feels guilty and pays some of it!
The other paper is my son's English homework. There is also a stray elastic band, the brown paper I wrapped my Mum's present in and the cake box with the red velvets.
If you want to see something more interesting, go over to Julia's blog and check out the other desks.
I'll be picking the winner of my cushion later today once a random boy comes home from school to choose a random number.
Gotta dash the shops are calling.

Tuesday, 8 May 2012

So Tired

I'm writing this trying to fight the urge to go back to bed! I had a really bad night's sleep last night and feel so tired. Going back to bed is not something I usually do but on Thursday I did and, oh my, it was lovely! Afterwards I went into town with my husband for a coffee and a little shopping, only boring things like school shirts as we don't have the money for random shopping.
On Friday I went to The Eternal Maker in Chichester for a cushion making workshop. After fighting with my machine, bias binding, piping and zips, I came away with this

Now, I've made cushions before but never with piping, especially piping with handmade bias binding! I do love it and this one is not for sale! However, I have an order for one to go to California and possibly another is going to South Shields to an ex-Londoner.
Saturday was spent mainly in my sons' bedroom sorting out a space for his Lego Star Wars collection. We ended up with a lovely space, a tidied room, 3 bags for the tip, two bags for the charity shop and one bag of things to sell. My husband cooked dinner, a rare treat, he cooks a mean chicken and noodles hot enough to clear my sinuses and headaches!
On Sunday my mother in law came for dinner and we had an amazing leg of lamb, delicious.
Monday was wet as only a Bank Holiday can be so I made these red velvet cup cakes with two tone icing! I've made them before but this was a different recipe and I can highly recommend it

And finally, today is my Mum's birthday and this is her card, I forgot to take pictures of the others I made!
The inspiration for it was stolen from the wonderful Kirsty Wiseman, you really should follow her blog.
Don't forget to leave a comment on my previous post to be in with a chance of winning a cushion.
Take carexx

Wednesday, 2 May 2012

WOYWW #152 and A Giveaway

I am going to keep it short and sweet this week, just as Julia wishes!
Very organised, I hear you cry. Well I am determined to achieve something today! I have to make three cards, one for my nephew who was 12 yesterday (my children are seeing him on Friday) one for my Mum and one for my husband's aunt, they share the same birthday! I know what I'm doing for my nephew, an ink swipe and a masculine stamped image, but as for the ladies? Who knows? I may do dome blog hopping for inspiration or I may just trawl through the pictures of my cards which I've made before.

A closer look into the boxes! I must find a better way to store ink pads! I don't have a dedicated craft room so all my supplies are in a 6 drawer plastic cabinet thingy in the front room, not ideal but at least it's down here where I craft. In the past it has been in the dining room, the spare room and my bedroom!
Finally I'll leave you with a note I left for my husband. He is going out tonight so, in order to be home early he had to start work at the crack of sparrows.

Oh my, I nearly forgot the giveaway! I've been waiting for certain numbers on my hit counter and I keep missing them! Anyway, it has now gone over the 2500 mark so I'm going to give away one of my cushions! All you have to do is leave a comment on this post and I'll get a random child to choose a random number!
This is the cushion you'll win.

So, enjoy your weekly snoop on Julia's blog and leave me a comment to be in with a chance of winning.
Take Care

Tuesday, 1 May 2012

Tuesday, that's all!

I thought I should do a post today so that when WOYWW comes around I can keep it short, just as Julia requests!
Thank you all for your birthday wishes for George, he had a lovely day. After his parents evening we went out for a Chinese meal with my Mum, which was great especially as she paid! George got lots of lovely presents and money, it never ceases to amaze me how generous my family and friends are.
On Thursday I was supposed to be going to Arundel to meet my Godmother for a mooch around the antiques shops and have a little lunch. Unfortunately, George woke up with a migraine so I had to cancel my day. He was also off on Friday so I took the opportunity to make some thank you cards.

On Saturday I took George and his friend to Westfield shopping centre in London to help him spend his birthday money. What a place that is. Have you ever been? It is full of rich people, expensive shops and spoilt brats throwing tantrums. We trawled through all the men's shops and weren't really getting anywhere with George, he's not really into modern clothes and whatever I suggests he just says no I don't like it or it won't suit him. After a few hours we had to go to Boots to get plasters for his blisters! After a very long and frustrating time trying to get his boots back on we had the most amazing breakthrough. George said that he hates going to school on mufti day because his clothes aren't fashionable and come from cheap shops. He said he wasn't popular because of what he wears. We had a long chat and I told him that clothes don't make a person popular and that non-uniform days are actually just another uniform day and that if he wanted to conform, then he just needed to buy one t-shirt and a pair of shoes and wear that every mufti day.
When we left he said, 'Actually Mum, can we pop back to Top Man I think I want to get something' It was amazing, he bought a shirt, a sweatshirt and some socks and he also saw some trousers but they didn't have his size. I asked him what made him change his mind about the clothes and he said, 'I guess I just needed a slap round the face!' I love my son!

We returned to Victoria and went to Pizza Express for a lovely meal, paid for with Tesco Clubcard Vouchers!

Sunday was just spent doing nothing as the weather was so awful.
Sorry about the wordy post but my laptop won't recognise my photo memory card for some reason. I'll try to rectify it tomorrow!
Take care